What’s stopping you?

Have you been thinking of taking up a new career?  Maybe there is something exciting that you have always wanted to do but for one reason or another you have never quite got round to it. Do you have a small voice in the back of your head telling you why it won’t work?  Perhaps you are afraid?    Here’s some good news for you.  There are a couple of things that you can do today that will make a real difference.    First of all, book onto a course that will really help.  Find out what motivates you and from that learn to…

Read more...

Anxiety, a client’s perspective

OK – so you reckon I’m not really anxious? What about that worry I have that I might not be able to pay my mortgage next month? I feel pretty anxious about that. And I think that my best friend is really cross with me – I feel anxious about that. In fact, I feel uptight and stressed. Its all very well but actually……. Wow, just slow down. This is how I used to feel much of the time. Until, that is, I learnt how to get on top of these thoughts. Because that’s all they are; thoughts. My anxiety…

Read more...

Beliefs

‘Our beliefs strongly influence our behaviour’ (‘Introducing Neuro-Linguistic Programming’ Connor & Seymour)  – a really strong statement.  A quick example – if you believe that you can’t sing then you are most unlikely to consider joining a choir.    So why do we have beliefs?  Our belief system is how we make sense of our world.  We believe in the laws of nature, we know that we can’t step off tall buildings and survive, we know that fire burns and that night follows day.  We learn these things as we grow up but we also learn beliefs that shape our lives.  Our parents…

Read more...

Running on empty

When you think of caring, who do you think of?  Probably not yourself.  We have a huge tendency to look after everyone else and then what happens?  We forget to look after ourselves.  Imagine if you went to see a doctor and he was dripping blood from an open wound – I guess you would suggest that he sorted himself out before he came near you.  And that’s what we all need to do.  We can’t help others from a place of pain and hurt, from a place of emptiness.  The skill lies in finding ways to make ourselves whole and…

Read more...

Clear the screen

Do you have a lot of ‘yes buts’ in your life?  Do you spend a lot of time being afraid of what might happen or looking to recreate something good that has happened before?  Bevis tells us the tale of the rattlesnake and the butterfly.  If you are out walking and you encounter a rattlesnake you will quite probably be pretty freaked, I know I would.  If you are not careful you will be on the lookout for rattlesnakes every time you go out – especially if you go back to where you saw it the first time.    How about…

Read more...

Frustration!

I used to get really frustrated when things didn’t turn out how I had planned.  I have a new idea at least every day, I make plans and I expect things to work perfectly.  I expect to write that book in a week, get lots of clients, get fit and lose weight.  I thought this was all quite reasonable. But low and behold, it didn’t all happen!  The outcomes didn’t meet my expectations, I was frustrated (after all, I had done my best, I’d worked really hard) and I was so very disappointed.  The fact that I had written the…

Read more...

What we can learn from the animal kingdom

  Have you ever spent time in nature, staring at the ocean, up into the night sky or even into the eyes of a favourite pet? What happens? We become still and life’s cares seem to disappear…. To of my family members have asked what Iit is about the seaside or flowers that makes them feel more peaceful and the answer is always the same… That peace is inside each of us and emerges when we look in awe or love at nature, nature and our favourite pets don’t have to do lists and they aren’t fighting to get to…

Read more...

The ego versus the true self

These words came out of a recent coaching session and I thought they may be of use to you… NB Whatever words I use are never accurate enough to properly describe the true self… The egoic mind can be brash or arrogant. It lies within our own head and can be anxious, worried or a victim. It has dramas, battles and is addicted to pleasure, distractions and pain. It is the emotion which arises from those pleasures, distractions & pains and is triumphant when things are perceived to have gone well and despondent when things do not… It is the…

Read more...

What we can all learn from Phil Collin’s!

I was away in Wales for half term (Aberdovey to be precise) an amazing place by the coast where mountains and the Sea collide! We were away with a big family group and hence my grip on the TV remote was not quite as secure and I found myself watching the Jonathan Ross show one evening… Not my typical fare however I found myself being drawn in to the interview with Phil Collin’s. The first thing that struck me was when he walked onto set with a walking stick. In my mind he was still actively drumming away In a…

Read more...